Taofeek
A grin was plastered on
my face as I changed into a simple t-shirt and a pair of shorts. Khayrah was
very excited to see her family members. I chuckled as I heard their vibrant
voices from the living room. My surprise was the best!
I had sat down on the
bed to change into my shorts when my phone buzzed with a new notification. It
was from Funmilayo.
I’m
sorry to bother you. I know you have a lot of expenses to make…but please,
remember that your children have started school and they need to pay their
school fees. They also need to eat. I hope to hear from you soon.
-
Funmilayo.
My face felt paralyzed
as I read through the contents. I jammed on my phone’s keyboard to reply.
I’m
so sorry, Funmilayo. I am broke. The month will end in the next four days. I’ll
send you something by then. Thanks for your understanding.
-
Taofeek.
I clicked ‘send’ and
walked out of the room to meet only Fadilah and her father in the living room.
Khayrah’s father had his phone pressed to his left ear as he spoke earnestly
while Fadilah sat on the sofa, watching the TV.
“They are in the
kitchen,” Fadilah smiled at me as she noticed my questioning eyes searching for
Khayrah and her mother.
“Oh….” I stuttered. “I
thought as much.”
Sincerely, I’d never
quite related well with Khayrah’s family members, asides her mother. Her mother
had soft and understanding eyes that usually portrayed the love she had for her
daughter.
‘Khayrah
loves you so much. And I know you love her. So, I love you both for loving
yourself.’ She had remarked on a particular evening when I had
called her to relate my worry about Khayrah’s state of health. It was when she
was still brooding over the loss of Tijani.
Her last statement
still rang in my memory. It meant a lot to me. She knew we both love ourselves
deeply…but Khayrah’s father was different. I would feel nervous whenever I was
relating to him. He acted nice and polite and he always offered to assist us in
whatever way he could…but there was still something about his questioning eyes.
Like I had gotten married to his daughter because of his money.
“Brother Taofeek?”
Fadilah called as I shook my head and regained myself. I hadn’t noticed that I
had been staring at him for long- the man who was dressed in a white kaftan and
black cap. Khayrah’s father would be in his early fifties. He was of average
height and had chocolate-coloured skin and small, beady eyes. Fadilah was the
direct replica of her father, only that she took her mother’s complexion and
eyes.
“Yes, Fadilah. I hope
you’re enjoying your stay here?”
Her face flickered with
a smile, revealing her wide eyes like that of Khayrah’s. “I am. Your house’s
cool. You’re very handsome. I don’t know if I’m allowed to compliment the looks
of my sister’s husband,” she laughed. “But in all sense, you are. The day you
two met, my sister could not sleep. She was so crazy about you. Now, she’s
pregnant. I mean, my elder sister is pregnant. The same person that shared the
same room with me. We would dance delightfully when our parents were fast
asleep and talk about how we imagined our future husband. One of those nights,
Khayrah had placed a pillow beneath her blouse and feigned pregnancy.” Fadilah
laughed again and I joined her.
“What I’m trying to say
is that time flies so fast that you can hardly realize that things are
changing. Events are occurring and as they do, we pass through several phases
in life. Sometimes, when I look back at those days, I wonder if they are real.
If they truly happened. And I’m grateful for life and love, and hope. I watched
my sister shed buckets of tears. We thought she would leave so soon. We gazed
at her like that would be our last. But here she is, happily married and
expecting her first child. Alhamdulillah.” Fadilah stated as she cleaned streaks
of tears that fell from her eyes.
“I’m sorry for
blabbering, brother Taofeek. I just felt so overwhelmed visiting you and seeing
the glow on my sister’s face. Please don’t tell her I said any of these.” She
smiled at me in a pleading manner, revealing the intensity of her red-painted
lips.
Fadilah was dressed in
a red kimono and black veil. Her face glittered, courtesy of the Tara brown powder Khayrah had told me
her sister saved money to purchase. I glanced at her petite stature and skin,
the colour of papaya. And I wondered how two siblings could be different.
Khayrah was selectively shy. She had this excellent aura that swept around her.
Khayrah would study an environment critically before being her real self. Well,
I saw a different side of Fadilah today. I never knew she could reflect deeply.
“I won’t. Let me go
check on them,” I remarked as I turned to leave. I spotted Khayrah’s father,
who was now resting on the wall. He was still deeply concentrated in his
phone’s conversation. He greeted me with his eyes and I smiled in return as I
sauntered towards the kitchen door.
I heard voices as I
attempted to turn the doorknob.
Does
he know…I’m scared…isn’t pregnancy…the doctor assured…let’s keep praying…
I heard filters from
the conversation Khayrah had with her mother. In order not to get caught
eavesdropping, I walked away and headed for the room.
Settling on the bed, I
read John Green’s The Fault In Our Stars for the seventh time and pondered over
deep words the author had written. I had read the book for the first time
during my final year in the university and I had no flick of an idea that a
similar incident would happen to me. That I would fall in love with someone who
is counting her last breaths.
I had spent five
minutes reading the book when my phone rang. I picked it up. It was Ridwan
calling.
“Asalamu ‘alaykum, bro.
How are you and how’s the family?” I greeted cheerfully.
“AlhamduliLlaah. They
are fine. Little Zulaihat also sends her regards,” he chuckled. “I actually
called to ask if you’ve gotten your bills settled. Have you found anyone to
lend you some money?”
“I haven’t oo. But the month will end in four days.
I believe we can manage until then. Thanks so much for your care.”
“You’re welcome. How’s
your pregnant wife doing?”
I laughed proudly.
“Healthier than ever. That reminds me, I spoke to dad yesterday. His legs still
hurt him. But he said it’s getting better as he’s using the drugs administered
by the doctor.”
“Ah, AlhamduliLlaah. I’ll call him today. Old age ehn. Who will ever imagine that our
energetic father will suffer from arthritis?”
“Abi oo…” I was saying when Khayrah entered the room, smiling
teasingly and pulling me up with her onion-smelling hand.
“Food is ready,” she
whispered as she kissed my right cheek.
“Ridwan. I’ll call you
back.” I said in a frisson as I tailed her.
***
“All the time Khayrah
and I made the meal, Fadilah sat in the living room watching the TV.” Her
mother frowned at Fadilah as she served the meal on the dining table. I took a
seat beside her father as I perceived the nice aroma of fish stew wafting the
atmosphere.
“But mom, you know I
don’t like cooking. Who made it compulsory for all women to like cooking?”
Khayrah’s mother
scrunched up her face as she glared at Fadilah. “Eri eleyi ni! Who told you cooking is not compulsory for women?
Even if you hire a cook and let her do all the meals, she’ll end up snatching
your husband. Look at your sister. Remember how she would sit in the room and
expect Hafsah to do everything in the kitchen? By force by force, she has fallen in love with cooking,” She said
as we all laughed.
I dipped my spoon into
the plate of boiled rice and fish sauce, turned part and placed a spoon in my
mouth. It was at that moment that Khayrah’s father cleared his throat.
I willed myself to
swallow the food as I imagined what would come next. He never cleared his
throat except that something big would be coming up.
“Taofeek?” he said in
his usual high-pitch voice.
“Hmm?” I swallowed hard
and turned towards him.
“I heard about a group
Khayrah attends. A cancer support group. And I was wondering, why would she
decide to attend such a group?”
“It’s a beneficial
group. They talk about healing from pain…and she has also made friends from
there…” I prattled.
“Friends that die every
day like chickens? Friends that remind her that she would die soon? I heard she
was very sick when she lost a dear friend few months back. What’s his name
again…yes…Tijani. I think she gains nothing from attending such a group,” he blurted
out and the air felt still for a minute.
Everyone was quiet save
for the occasional clacking of spoons against the ceramic plate and peering
eyes that travelled questioningly amongst ourselves.
Khayrah’s mother
chuckled nervously and broke the silence a minute later. “You made a good
opinion, my dear, but why don’t you discuss this with Taofeek after the meal?”
“Yes, fabulous idea,”
Khayrah smiled.
My phone buzzed in my
pocket and I picked it up hurriedly. Since my financial situation grew worse, I’d
had the fetish for checking my phone repeatedly as if someone would suddenly
consider to send me money and I would receive a credit alert.
Surprisingly, it was
the credit alert I had been yearning from. But…it was from someone I never
expected. It was from Khayrah’s father!
Stealing glances at
them, I noticed Khayrah and her mother glanced at me and looked away
immediately. I knew at once what had happened. Khayrah had told her mother
about my financial condition. Her mother had asked her husband for help. Khayrah’s
father had sent the money and he hadn’t stopped to wonder if I could really
cater to the needs of his daughter.
My legs felt wobbly and
I gulped a cup of water. My forehead had beads of sweat and my hands shook
unusually. I felt ashamed and unworthy of being a husband. I could eat no more
with several thoughts going on in her father’s mind.
“Excuse me,” I said
politely as I walked out of the dining room.
I headed towards the
balcony and inhaled the fresh air that swept the surrounding. Tears burnt my
eyes as I replayed the scenario over and over again in my head. Was Khayrah’s
father indirectly mocking me by asking those questions? How would her family
see me? As a husband who cannot cater to his family’s needs? Why would Khayrah
tell her mother about my financial situation? Why do I have to be wayward
before now? If I didn’t have children out of wedlock to cater for, wouldn’t my
life be simpler?
“Darling,” Khayrah
called as she joined me in the balcony.
I didn’t respond. I was
infuriated. She shouldn’t have told her parents. She shouldn’t have. We could
have worked it out as a family.
My face softened a bit
as Khayrah hugged me at the back. “I’m sorry, my love. I never knew it would
happen this way. Even if you won’t tell me, I knew you were broke and I was
just trying to help…”
“Trying to help?” I
yelled as I removed her hands that surrounded my back and turned towards her
with a glaring look. “I never asked for your help. Why did you tell your
mother? Why?”
“You needed help but
you were too proud to say it. You wouldn’t even tell me, your wife. And my dad
is wealthy and always ready to assist us…”
I stifled a snort of
laughter. “Always willing to help? Didn’t you witness what played out some
minutes ago? He believes I married you because of his money.”
Khayrah frowned. “No,
don’t say that. He doesn’t think so. I’m sure of that.”
“He does, and most
people think so too! I’d overheard people in my street gossiping about me. They
called me a fornicator who got married to a woman with a terminal illness
because she’s from a wealthy home. People say this and that. They make
assumptions about me. And you still want me to ask your father for help?”
Khayrah winced as a
tear dropped on her cheek. “Who cares what people say? We both know how we feel
for each other, Taofeek. You love me and I can feel it deep down my heart. I
can never appreciate you enough for loving me despite knowing my health
condition. I don’t care about your past because I trust my husband and I am
certain that he would never cheat on me. So, who cares what anyone says? What
matters is us. We shouldn’t stop
loving and caring for each other every passing minute. And I think you’re
making assumptions with regards to my father. Maybe he doesn’t show it but he
appreciates you a lot. And he doesn’t think you’re a gold-digger. I’m a hundred
percent certain. Please, darling, let’s leave all elements of doubts aside and
fight all obstacles together. I want us to be a hundred percent sincere. You should
tell me when you’re broke. I should tell you that Tijani has been appearing in
my dreams.” Khayrah said as she looked away.
I gasped in surprise.
“Tijani?”
She bit her lower lip
nervously. “Yes.”
“How long has this been
happening?”
“Four months. I’m
sorry.”
I pulled her into a
hug. “It’s okay. We’ll discuss that later. I love you.”
“I love you, too,”
Khayrah replied when my phone started to ring.
“Oh, gosh! Why does
this phone keep intruding on our special moment? Should I yank this object
away?” her face broke into a joyful smile.
“Yes, let’s.” I
chuckled as I checked the caller ID. It was an unknown number. I clicked on the
answer button and pressed the phone to my ear. “Hello?”
“Surprise. Since you
refused to pick my calls, now I’ve used a different number. I am in Nigeria!
Come and pick me up at the airport, dad.”
“Aliyah?”
“Yes, Aliyah. Come and
pick me up. I’m waiting!”
“Okay,” I muttered as I
hung up the call.
“Aliyah is in Nigeria?”
“Yes, she just arrived.
We should pick her up. What will we tell your family members?”
“We’ll sort it out.”
“Yes, we will,” I
replied as we both laughed.
“Wait, I’ve got no
appetite for the meal anymore. Can we visit a buka on our way to the airport?”
I looked up dazedly at
her face. “You haven’t visited a buka
before, like ever?”
Khayrah rolled her
eyes. “Oh, please. Don’t mock me now. Let’s go.”
“You’re still the
weirdest being I’ve ever met,” I snickered as we left the balcony.
***
While I drove to the
airport, Khayrah kept talking about Aliyah…and children…and Aliyah…and
children.
I knew she was nervous
that Aliyah had returned. Khayrah had never been good with children…talk more
than a teenager. I had spotted the anxiety appearing in her face since Aliyah
made the call. But I’d missed Aliyah. I’d missed my first daughter. The one I’d
held in my arms and wept tears of joy. I’d miss her vibrant laughter and
angelic voice. I’d missed the way she would roll her eyes and pout her eyes
whenever she wanted a thing from me. I’d missed Aliyah so much.
“…children are the gift
of life. Yes, they can be trouble. But they are sweet and innocent…” Khayrah
was saying as she opened another wrap of bubble gum and started to chew.
“I never loved
children. I never even imagined living with them. But the day Aliyah had been
placed on my hands and I just stared at the beautiful being cooing and
wriggling her hands. And I fell in love with her that minute. Even when Jasmine
dropped her and fled off, I gladly nurtured Aliyah till she grew up. It was
hard but I tried my best to be a good father.”
Khayrah surveyed my
face thoughtfully. “Is that why you couldn’t forgive her?”
“She left me and
started staying with the woman that left her years ago, without prior notice.
It hurt me deeply.”
Khayrah held my hand
and rubbed it with care. “But she has realised her mistake. You ought to
forgive her now.”
“I have forgiven her
long ago. I just wanted her to know that what she did was wrong.”
“Okay,” Khayrah replied
as I pulled into the parking lot.
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